


let's not fall in love

by chuntao



Category: EXO (Band)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Soulmates, Alternate Universe - Vampire, M/M, Soulmate-Identifying Marks
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-01-03
Updated: 2016-01-03
Packaged: 2018-05-11 08:02:29
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 1
Words: 6,753
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5619565
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/chuntao/pseuds/chuntao
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Perhaps, he thinks, it’s a good thing that Jongdae can’t feel it, that way Jongdae won’t come too close. (Perhaps, he thinks, this time he’ll make the mistake of approaching). or, that suchen soulmate AU with soulmate marks and vampires.</p>
            </blockquote>





	let's not fall in love

**Author's Note:**

> x-posted to my LJ and written for chenpionships.

 

-

There’s a mark that every human and every creature has, one that signifies the old storybook “soul mate,” and promises an equally fairy-tale-like life if your other half is found. In vivid colours, the mark is shared between soul mates; both possessing the same unique mark that shares no pattern, colour, or design to any other being’s except their other half. They range from a wide expansion of green and blue sweeping over one’s back to a small and hidden dusted pink against the thigh or hip. They represent everlasting love, bright colours for the emotions of love, and intricate designs for the dimensions of love. However, at death the energetic and electric colours darken, dyed with the black of death until all that remains is a dull outline of what used to be, colour stripped away. It’s almost cruel as the black serves as a reminder for what was lost, for the soul mate taken by the soft touch of death.

Joonmyun wears his love on the end of his sleeve, quite literally. Beneath the soft fabric, a thin line stretches around his wrist, colour fluorescent blue mixed with a ruby red; weaving pathways over each other and culminating in an intricate circle in which red meets blue to form a royal purple. The mark had morphed years ago, presumably after his last soul mate had died. It’s because of this Joonmyun has trouble accepting the idea of a soul mate. Through their long lives, vampires experience tens of soul mates, some lost to war, some lost to old age. The idea of a soul mate insinuates that there’s only one person you could ever love, one person who’s perfect for you. But when that changes with the flip of a dime, it’s hard to believe in the concept anymore.

-

Formalities, a long standing tradition (among many) in the vampire community; and one which Joonmyun couldn’t wait to cast aside one day in the future. (Unfortunately change came at the pace of his developing signs of old age – read: never). With a prolonged life span, it was hard to do anything but look back. Many looked back to a “better time” when vampires roamed the world unchallenged by other supernatural presences. They wished for a world where vampires reigned true as leaders and rulers, a superior race put rightfully on its pedestal above the rest. The loss of power only proved to the community the negativities that came with change, conning them further into becoming a society whole-heartedly resistant to the idea. Luckily, they _had_ retired the over-the-top clothing of the French during the 16 th century, replacing it for slim fitting suits; a change which Joonmyun was forever thankful for.

Change is good, and change is needed.

Memories of before bring him to his knees out of disgust, the primal way in which he acted unbearable to even think about.

Standing at the entryway, Joonmyun can’t help but think of all the things he could be doing instead of coming to this gathering. Lounging at home and flipping through a book, or a day trip to Jeju Island perhaps. It was a duty of his however, as one of the older reigning vampires in the community to attend gatherings. Whether or not he _wanted_ to was disregarded.

Loud murmurs surface and spill through the doors as they open, enveloping Joonmyun in their noise. Even so, the cacophony does nothing to hide the instantaneous pulse that thrums against his skin once he steps inside.

 _His soul mate_. 

Youngsik, the host of the gathering pushes Joonmyun towards a corner of the room where a boy sits; unknowingly urging Joonmyun closer to the origin of the pulsating sensation inside of him.

The boy sits there in front of him, a feline smile placed onto thin lips, the mark of his soul mate stretched across the expanse of his neck but darkened black with the knowledge that the other half was no longer living. Joonmyun stares as his eyes trace the lines of the mark, taking in its familiar curvature with a sinking feeling dipping into the pit of his stomach. Despite lacking colour, there’s no question about it, the blackened mark wrapped around the boy’s neck is the same as Joonmyun’s own; the lines eerily familiar.

As Joonmyun seats himself across from the boy, his gaze traces up the boy’s arm, exposed and pale; following the pulsing of blood through the cord into a bag.  Almost dangerously, Joonmyun’s eyes flit back to his host, displeasure knitting the corners of his mouth tight as he tries to hide the disgust coiling inside of him. It puts their entire race back to the same level they were centuries ago when they heeded no rules and morally stood no higher than animals themselves. But most of all, Joonmyun feels his emotions boil at the sight of his _soul mate_ being used for nothing more than a glorified blood bank.

Youngsik introduces the boy as Jongdae, and when Joonmyun tests the name out on his own tongue, it feels oddly perfect. A calm wave dissipates the bubbling anger inside of him enough so Joonmyun may feign nonchalance once again. Never had Joonmyun had a reaction such as this with a soul mate before, this tugging he felt was somehow _different_ , more insistent. Then again, with previous soul mates the tug had been buried beneath layers of insatiable hunger clawing at the back of his throat.

When he was young, Joonmyun would have never batted an eyelash at behaviour like this. It was the norm back then, and it was a norm that the young vampire had embraced at the time. During his rebirth as a vampire, humans were nothing more than a disposable resource for blood and Joonmyun took advantage of this mind-set. Vampires were, in every way, superior to humans. With minds supple and weak compared his own, Joonmyun had never found himself hungry for more than a few hours. Rather, blood was an abundance.

In the past Joonmyun lived his life with very few reservations.

⇥【House petite with a flourishing garden in the front, to the outside world, he lived a rather unsuspecting life in the grand scheme of things. Newspapers were delivered in the early morning, and paperwork was completed before the evening sun had disappeared over the edge of the earth. It was the secrets inside the petite house that drew attention.

Flecks of blood painted thin tear-like trails as they slipped down the cool white tile. In the corner of the room, several bodies were thrown haphazardly into a pile, carcasses drained of all remaining nutrients. Half of another rested over the edge of the tub, wrists suspended against the rim as blood dripped from an open cut like a faucet dripping water.

Joonmyun sat inside the bathtub, cold skin itching with heat of fresh blood as he basked lazily across the length of bath. Dipping a hand into the dark mass, it emerges bloody and bright before him. A soft moan fills the room as Joonmyun licks a length up his own arm, eyes flashing hues of yellow and orange, mirroring the colours of his current soul mate mark.】

This is the first time Joonmyun has ever _met_ his soul mate. Met his soul mate without any shifted intentions hidden beneath a mask of interest. Met his soul mate without yearning solely for their blood. It’s the first time Joonmyun has actually felt the tug of a soul mate, the mark on his wrist pulsing slowly against his skin. He knows that Jongdae can’t feel the tug as Joonmyun does, Jongdae’s mark was blackened, unable to receive or process the connection between soul mates perceived dead. Perhaps, he thinks, it’s a good thing that Jongdae can’t feel it, that way Jongdae won’t come too close. (Perhaps, he thinks, this time he will make the mistake of approaching).

The host bids a temporary goodbye and leaves Joonmyun alone with his soul mate.

As if feeling Joonmyun’s gaze on the bag, the boy across from him speaks, expression smiling but the slightest trace of bitterness tinting the edges of his words, “It’s not as bad as it looks, I assure you. They don’t mistreat me; I give them their blood after all.”

The words do little to quell Joonmyun’s anger but he manages to force it down, stiffly offering out a hand instead,

“Kim Joonmyun. Eighth elder currently residing in the city of Seoul.”

“It’s a pleasure to meet you Lord Joonmyun.”

Found on the streets waddled in blankets, Kim Jongdae grew up immersed in the life of the supernatural. With a condition that has Jongdae’s body producing twice the amount of blood his body can actually handle, he fits in perfectly with the vampires, providing them with an easy-access meal.

Raised as a precious blood source for Youngsik, Jongdae has spent most of his life tucked away from society, the vampire intending to keep Jongdae for himself. He’s taught the ways of the vampires, the proper etiquette and history that comes with a race as old as the country itself. It’s not a bad life, not really. Jongdae is fed in order to stay healthy and continue supplying Youngsik with blood, and he has free access to the house and the garden.

But it would be a lie to say he didn’t yearn for more.

Perhaps that is why Jongdae accepts a stranger’s offer to take him away,

“Come with me.”

Jongdae comes.

They’re a few blocks away before Joonmyun even gets a hint that someone had noticed the absence of the human boy and vampire lord from the party. Hand in hand they sprint, Joonmyun already formulating a plan to safely steal the boy away from Youngsik and Korea itself.

-

Korea was different than China. China was a country where you fended for yourself, very much a dog eat dog world in many aspects. Despite the small percent of the population in Korea who paid no mind to traffic rules, China brought the violations to whole new level. Red lights were simply suggestions to drivers, and if you were hit by a car running a light it most certainly would not be their fault.

Poverty was everywhere. At first you wouldn’t see it, but then you would turn a corner and it would be there, staring you in the face in the form of a legless man on a skateboard making his way to the subway to beg; filling up your nose with the smell of piss and garbage. There was something terribly unsettling with seeing people, humans or not, living in conditions that in most other places wouldn’t be deemed sufficient for even a pet.

Even so, Joonmyun had never understood the disgust that some held for the country and all of its flaws: the censorship, the poverty, the illegal markets. They were all just aspects of China that were simply _China_ , there was no other way to phrase it. Sure they were bad, but it wasn’t something that was about to change anytime soon. Many of the flaws were so ingrained that it was practically part of the definition of the culture.

Unless you lived in one of the “faces” of China (read: the tourist cities), poverty was kept out of sight and hidden. Hidden away from the foreigners and probing views and left to the smaller communities to deal with on their own. Even in Beijing walls had been built around the older neighbourhood in the centre of the city, hiding the decrepit buildings away from tourists’ eyes glazed over with excitement of visiting a new country.

However, even amongst the anonymity that China provided, Jongdae and Joonmyun still weren’t far enough away. Youngsik had connections that stretched farther than Joonmyun had thought and within thirty minutes of stepping into the bustling streets they were being followed. Steps quick, it was unsurprisingly hard to lose the tails.

They’ve ducked into a back alley of Beijing, empty despite the dense population, and hidden in the shadows cast by lights of the night.

Joonmyun hadn’t fed in days and Jongdae’s body was beginning to weaken as his blood content started to rise once again. They weren’t fast enough to get away like this.

“Take it.” There’s no room for arguments in the way Jongdae looks at Joonmyun, eyes steady and sure. It’s tantalising, the colour of the blood alone makes Joonmyun’s mouth water in an undeniable carnal urge. But he had sworn off human blood, committing himself to a life feeding on the blood of animals (no one lets him forget the similarities of the decision to _Twilight_ ’s sparkling hero). It was something he had never admitted to himself, much less anyone else: Joonmyun was _scared_ of what he might do if given the taste of fresh blood once again and would do anything to avoid reliving his past.

Jongdae simply gives him an exasperated look as he forces his arm towards the vampire.

“I think you’re forgetting that I _need_ to do this. I _need_ to lose blood, if I don’t _I_ will suffer.”

It takes another several minutes of prodding and nudging on Jongdae’s part, but Joonmyun finally gives in, taking Jongdae’s arm gently in his hands and licking at the cut softly, tentatively at first. When Joonmyun actually begins to _drink_ , his eyes flit up to meet Jongdae’s, blues mixed with reds shining in his eyes under the influence of human blood after so many years. The heat is a long missed friend as it courses down Joonmyun’s throat and settles in his stomach, warming him from the inside out and he gives a soft moan of satisfaction.

(Blood from one’s soul mate truly was the best).

“I didn’t realise my blood was good enough to make someone outright moan.” Despite the lilting tone, Joonmyun can feel Jongdae tensing under his hands and withdraws. (If Jongdae notices the soft press of lips to his skin afterwards he doesn’t say anything).

Another seven minutes of rapid walking and they lose the vampires on a train, too crowded to fit the two vampires attempting to shove their way on and leaving them behind in the process.

-

When they settle down for the night, Jongdae has somehow managed to find comfort by Joonmyun’s warm-by-blood side. Tucked into the blankets of the bed, he looks up to the vampire,

“Why?”

The question isn’t angry, or scared. Just, curious. And even without a subject, Joonmyun knows what Jongdae is trying to ask, ‘ _Why did you save me?’_ Something in Joonmyun pulls at him, urging him to tell Jongdae that he was his _soul mate_ and now – now, they could spend their lives together. Eternity even if Jongdae wished. But something else tugs him hard in the opposite direction, bringing memories of what _had_ been and what _could_ be if Joonmyun wasn’t careful. So he lies.

“Our race may drink blood to live, but I do not believe we have to _be_ monsters. What they were doing to you, how they were treating you, was beyond inhumane.” Joonmyun’s hand tightens around an unknown resistance and when he looks down, he sees Jongdae’s hand intertwined with his own. What he had said was undeniably the truth, but it wasn’t _why_. As much as he would like to proclaim himself a ‘good man,’ if he had witnessed this treatment with any other human Joonmyun wouldn’t have done a single thing to help. He would have left with the knowledge that there was still wrong in the world, but the sentiment that it was not his duty to interfere. Jongdae, his soul mate, had changed everything.

“My treatment there may not have been ideal, but it wasn’t unbearable. I could manage with the idea that I would be feeding vampires for the rest of my life.” After a few moments of silence, Jongdae motions to his neck, light fingers tracing the outlines of the mark, words speaking truth on unfounded trust made in mere hours, “ _This_ is what I find hard. Knowing that no one is out there looking for me, thinking of me.” A pause, “I think I would have liked the feeling of knowing that someone loves – no, not even that.” Jongdae restarts, “I think I would have liked the feeling knowing that there’s someone out there for me. Someone who could give me, at the very least, the ability to entertain a reality different from this one.”

A voice inside of Joonmyun (an irrational and emotional voice) is trying to push through words of a confession, words of reassurance that ‘yes, there _is_ someone out there for you. I’m here for you.’ He wants to tell Jongdae that, ‘Your soul mate _is_ alive, not in the literal sense perhaps, but alive.’ Joonmyun doesn’t. Instead, he takes Jongdae’s hand back in his own (the one without the mark mirroring Jongdae’s) and gives it a small squeeze of reassurance, “Soul mate or not, it would be an honour for anyone to have you as a partner.”

At that, Jongdae’s hand retracts from Joonmyun’s once again (he doesn’t comment about how the loss of heat is immediately replaced with yet another layer of longing), “As much as I appreciate the compliment, I don’t think you’ve known me long enough to make a judgement like that,” Jongdae’s lips quirk into a half smile after the statement, “Then again, I don’t think I would choose to flee Korea with just anyone.”

Joonmyun quickly learns that Jongdae has a fascination with the outer world. He informs the elder vampire of his home-life with Youngsik and how he may be constrained to a single house, but he does _dream_. Pulling out a worn book, Jongdae flips through the old pages, littered with maps and pictures of fairy-tale like countries, small chicken-scratch handwriting noting places of interest in the country. From there, they choose their next destination. China is too close to Korea to be safe, and there is so much of the world that Jongdae has yet to explore. Eyes closed and book on his lap, Jongdae’s finger blindly points to Switzerland. Joonmyun knows exactly where to go.

-

Joonmyun drives them across the countryside, the road narrowing as they reach the mountains, just barely enough to fit one car. From inside, Jongdae looks down over the guard rails of the winding road and is met with bright and glistening greens off the edge of the cliff, leaves rustling with the blow of the wind.

They arrive in a small town, streets cobbled and buildings etched with designs alluding to a time long passed. Straight out of a storybook, the town is in full bloom under the summer sun, heliotropic flowers opened wide under the warm rays. Mountains line the distance, lighting the bright blue sky with snow-peaked tips. And as Jongdae steps out of the car butterflies flit around him in a small swirl of rainbow colours, drawing a burst of laughter from the boy – the sound as light as the gravity defying butterflies.

“Scuol.” Joonmyun calls it.

Cottage-like, they settle into a small home a few minutes’ walk from the centre of the little town.

“I was away from Korea for some time, and while wandering I stumbled across this place. I fell in love instantly.”

Two nights later, Joonmyun takes Jongdae up the mountain on a gondola, watching as Jongdae stares down at the scenery below him, excitement flitting through his eyes the whole way up. Stars lighting the sky, up on the mountain they feel close enough to touch, and Jongdae tries to do just that – hand reaching out to grasp a star and coming back with nothing. Joonmyun takes them to a clearing, tall grass tickling their skin as they lay there. The pair of them lie beneath an endless ocean of glittering stars, bright and shining as they sweep over the night’s sky. Myths of Orion and Gemini slip from Joonmyun’s mouth as Jongdae silently traces the invisible lines of the constellations beside the vampire in silent wonder.

A soft break in the conversation slips between them before Jongdae speaks.

“I lied before, the time when I told you that having this mark was ‘hard.’ It’s not a matter of finding it hard I- I hate this.”

Questioningly, Joonmyun glances to Jongdae; watching as the other moves a hand to cover his neck, eyes still trained on the stars above them. There’s a tightness in his voice that Joonmyun hasn’t heard before, and he wonders if it’s from the confession or the increasing strength with which Jongdae seems to hold his own neck.

“It’s cruel – this mark. I look in the mirror everyday only for it to stare back at me, reminding me of what could have been, but will never be.”

Jongdae closes his eyes, continuing, “When I look back, my memories are etched with nothing but black from the mark. Barely a shadow, the slightest hint of what it could have been has been abandoned. While I’m left with the skeleton of my mark, any true connection with my soul mate is gone as well.”

Another pause, and Jongdae’s words come out barely louder than a whisper, “Sometimes I think I hate my soul mate. I hate them for dying and stealing our link away before I was even old enough to comprehend what a soul mate was.”

A twinge of _regret? Guilt?_ finds its way beneath Joonmyun’s skin at the confession. There had been more than enough times to share his own mark with Jongdae, to confess himself. Yet each time, Joonmyun had, in the end, shied away from the idea. There were too many unanswered questions, too many _what ifs_. Never had Joonmyun _had_ this type of connection with his soul mate, he had never really interacted with them, never taken the time to fall irrevocably in _love_. Centuries old and overwhelmed with the emotion, Joonmyun was scared.

A self-deprecating laugh startles Joonmyun out of his thoughts, “How many soul mates have you even had? Ten? Twelve? I must sound silly bemoaning over one soul mate when vampires have so many more.”

Quick to correct, Joonmyun states, “Sixty-three.”

Jongdae, pulled from his melancholy mood baulks, “Sixty-three? That would make you at the very least-”

“I _know_.” Joonmyun’s words are sharp and he sits up, no longer enjoying the exposure of lying down. His cold expression holds only momentarily, melting into one of regret seconds after.

“I’m not that old, you know that. But a lot of my soul mates they - They passed away.”

“Because of the war?” A century and a half has passed since the vampires and humans fought. They had fought until everything around them reeked with the stench of death, and in the end, death was what brought them together in a truce. Joonmyun hadn’t fought in the war. He had hidden himself away, too intent on avoiding his vampiric nature to fight with his own culture, but not enough to fight against it.

“Yes- the war, but no. Not the war.” Joonmyun looks out in front of himself, watching fireflies flit among the flowers, “Jongdae I haven’t always been… _this_.” Motioning to himself, his expression seemingly weighs down the rest of his body, shoulders sagging, “When I was young, a fledgling, I was different from what I am now. I didn’t have _control_ , and there was little around to actually encourage me to keep it. Back then, vampires reigned freely over the humans, even if the humans didn’t know it. We fed from humans with very little consequence. There weren’t schools to teach you how to manage your hunger like there are now. I was a product of my environment, and went beyond what was considered brutal even then.”

Joonmyun can remember it all, “I regret what I did, but for a long time I didn’t.”

⇥【He’s kneeling on cold stones in front of the reigning family, head thrust up defiantly and blood messily dripping from his mouth, the mark on his wrist searing as it burned, pattern shifting.

Traditionally, the mark aged to a black when your soul mate died, but with vampires it was special, different. Rather than remain black, at their partner’s death a new mark formed; vibrant with colours that linked to a new soul mate.

Joonmyun had used the mark to his advantage, and he had used it in a way that even disgusted the communities at the time. It was easy. Easy to find his soul mate, a tug that Joonmyun had had years to learn and follow, and lure them in. They were oh so willing to come with him, a man of their dreams with not only a great personality, but the looks and money to go along with it.

He had lured them in with false promises of ‘love,’ ‘eternity,’ and a life together only to take it away from them.

Hunger insatiable, Joonmyun rarely went longer than a week without blood. But the humans were starting to notice, and Joonmyun had gained the attention of the reigning family as a result.

Certainly, it wasn’t easy to catch Joonmyun. Amped up on human blood his powers had increased under the influence, and only when three of the reigning family’s top hunters had come after him had Joonmyun lost.

Tackling him mid-feed, they had caught him off guard just enough to restrain him, chaining his arms and forcing him down onto his knees in front of the family,

“Kim Joonmyun, you have brought unwanted attention to the vampire community and have threatened our species. This act will not go unpunished.”

Snarling and tugging against his binds, Joonmyun mutters threats under his breath, promises of slow deaths and _revenge_. Queen Seondeok simply ignores the vampire’s threats, eyes narrowed and voice commanding when she sentences him,

“One-hundred years of imprisoned solitude. Minimum animal blood diet. Banishment from Korea for one-hundred years after release.”

Joonmyun is the antagonist in this story – he is the vampire of children’s nightmares, and nothing that he could ever do would erase that.】

Silence sits in between them as they head back to the cottage. The lights in Jongdae’s room have turned off, and Joonmyun sits on the edge his own bed, hands gripping each other tightly until his knuckles are turning white. Caught up reliving his past, he doesn’t notice when the door to his room opens, only registering the soft caress of a familiar hand carding back through his hair. Eyes flicking up, he meets Jongdae’s gaze, his own vulnerable and lost as he reaches out, arms wrapping around Jongdae’s waist and tugging him close. Even if the scent is new to Joonmyun, it’s so _familiar_ it hurts, and he’s burrowing against Jongdae’s stomach to get _more_ of the scent, _more_ of _Jongdae_.

When the warm body under his begins to move away, he reluctantly lets go, relaxing his hold to meet Jongdae’s eyes once again.

Hands soft against his skin, Jongdae cups his cheeks and leans down to press a soft kiss to Joonmyun’s lips.

-

Days pass and Joonmyun finds that he takes some sort of perverse pleasure in feeding from Jongdae, the blood fresh on his tongue as it spreads throughout his body. As he drinks he can feel the blood flow, his heart beginning to pump, to circulate it through his system. The way Jongdae half-snuggles up to him afterwards reminds him of what it’s like to _feel_ warmth, and be warm himself.

-

Light fingers trace the curvature of the pages, following the lines with eyebrows furrowed in concentration. The words are hard for Jongdae to make out. Only taught the basics of reading, he struggles with the more complex words, looking up to Joonmyun and then looking back down, not wanting to give in and ask for help.

Sensing Jongdae’s distress, Joonmyun scoots closer, wordlessly tucking his chin against Jongdae’s shoulder and staring down at the book; a free hand slipping around Jongdae’s waist. Eying the word where Jongdae’s finger has stopped, he repeats it aloud, soft in Jongdae’s ear, “Denouement. The culmination of events, the climax.”

They continue, Joonmyun glued to Jongdae’s side for the rest of the evening, simply enjoying the presence of his soul mate. In the back of his mind, Joonmyun thinks that Jongdae fits perfectly in his arm, fits perfectly tucked under his chin. Jongdae just _fits_.

-

Three weeks have passed before Youngsik arrives in Scuol with two other followers. They catch Joonmyun unprepared and he’s rushing Jongdae down to the car, the other vampires barely seconds behind.

“How did they find us?”

“It doesn’t matter. Jongdae we _have_ to get out of here.”

“-dae! –ongdae!” Ignoring the calls of Jongdae’s name, Joonmyun ushers the other towards the car, grip tightening and steps quickening.

“Come on, don’t listen to them.”

Youngsik reaches hearing distance, “Kim Jongdae, do you _know_ who that man is? What he’s done to his soul mates in the past? He’ll do that to you too Jongdae if you’re not careful. He’ll bleed you _dry_. Have you looked at his right wrist?”

Joonmyun is opening the car door when Jongdae pauses, looking towards Joonmyun’s wrist, hidden beneath his sleeve and Youngsik calls out,

“You haven’t have you.” It’s not even a question, and Joonmyun is practically pushing Jongdae into the car, attempting to avoid the words he know will come out of Youngsik’s mouth.

“Well of course not, _Lord Joonmyun_ would _never_ tell you what he is.”

The door closes, but Joonmyun knows that Jongdae can hear Youngsik’s last remark.

“He’s your _soul mate_!”

Adrenaline coursing through him, Joonmyun slams the car door shut and stomps on the gas, the car silent until he speaks, voice steely, “Jongdae, put on your seatbelt.” In the mirror, Joonmyun can see Youngsik’s car pulling out and giving chase, headlights blinding him. Another glance towards Jongdae and he’s more insistent this time, “Jongdae put your-”

“No! Do not ‘Jongdae’ _me_.” Jongdae is seething, red hot rage forming in his features, “Joonmyun what was he talking about, are you really-” He doesn’t even wait for himself to finish speaking before reaching out and grabbing at Joonmyun’s sleeve. Unable to safely fight back Jongdae’s hand and drive, Jongdae succeeds and Joonmyun’s mark stands bare against his arm.

Joonmyun catches the hurt and betrayal that flashes through Jongdae’s eyes as he recoils from Joonmyun. “How could you.” This wasn’t what Joonmyun wanted. He hadn’t wanted Jongdae to find out like this. ( _He hadn’t wanted Jongdae to find out at all_ ). Jongdae was never supposed to look at Joonmyun with that expression – he was never supposed to _hurt_ , but the words don’t stop, “I told you _everything_. I had to live with this- this dead _mark_ and you didn’t even have the decency to tell me that you, my soul mate, were alive? You _knew_ how alone I felt!”

“Jongdae you had me-”

“No, I _didn’t_. That much is obvious now.”

Joonmyun can see Youngsik getting closer, and he feels the bump against the back of their car as bumpers collide. The road is narrow as it is, and the curves are difficult to manage at the speed they’re going. With the added pressure from the back, Joonmyun isn’t sure how this will turn out.

“Jongdae _please_ , put on your seatbelt!”

“After all of this? You do _not_ get to tell me what to do.”

The car gets hit again, and Joonmyun loses control of the wheel, car heading towards the edge of the road. With what little time he has left he stretches across Jongdae’s lap, opening the door and pushing him out onto the road right before the car goes over.

From the open door, the last thing Joonmyun sees is that lost and scared look on Jongdae’s face, staring down at him as he plummets to the ground.

-

The attack begins on his first day back at the house. Youngsik has locked Jongdae in his room, coming by only to retrieve his blood from the drip. At first he’s just restless, needs to be moving or doing _something_. All he can think about is _Joonmyun_. _Joonmyun_ falling from the cliff, the crash of the car’s impact miles below echoing in his ears. _Joonmyun_ , his _soul mate_. Emotions slip in and out, jumbling into one tangled mess as Jongdae tries to sort out exactly what he _should_ be feeling.

From there, it progresses to straight out insomnia as Jongdae spends his nights with the stars and trapped in his own thoughts. Jongdae’s wish had come true, his soul mate had been alive for all these years. When he met his soul mate, he was truly _happy_ for once in his life. But in the end, his soul mate, Joonmyun, had died and the only one to blame for that was himself.

On the fifth day, Jongdae wakes up with a piercing pain in his stomach and a numbing tingling in his hands. When he tries to stand, Jongdae’s legs give out on him and he spends an hour curled up on the floor until someone comes in to check on him. He’s terrified as he lays there, _numb_ creeping up his arm. _This_ hadn’t happened in years, it _wasn’t_ supposed to happen in the first place. It’s hard for him to breathe and he remembers Youngsik years ago, telling him that the attacks were common with someone with his condition but if he ‘ _Behaved and did as he was told_ ,’ they wouldn’t happen.

Jongdae hopes that once again his soul mate mark is lying to him, and Joonmyun isn't dead.

-

He had awoken, dazed and confused at the base of the cliff, but nevertheless, alive. It had taken a week for Joonmyun to pull himself up the slippery rock and return to Seoul, Jongdae never leaving his mind, the last image of Jongdae’s frightened face never leaving his memory. There was no way he could let that happen again, no way he could let Jongdae sit in that _house_ and be scared, alone.

When they bring out Jongdae, all Joonmyun wants to do is run to him and pull him into a tight hug – then again, maybe that wouldn’t have been the best of ideas even if he _could_. Jongdae looks so terribly small after just a week and Joonmyun is afraid that Jongdae would break in his embrace. He’s lost weight, all sharp angles, and it’s obvious to Joonmyun that the chair is the only thing keeping him from keeling over.

“Lord Joonmyun, I thank you for gracing us with your presence. I would say I was waiting for you, but frankly I’m just surprised that you’re alive. I was planning to pay the reigning family a visit today, report your accidental death and keep the knowledge that _I_ had _killed_ one of the Seoul Elders all by myself a secret. You would think that someone as old as you would be _stronger_ , but Lord Joonmyun, you seem to be no stronger than a fledgling.”

Youngsik’s hand slips down to cup Jongdae’s chin as he leans down. Struggling, Jongdae manages to jerk his head away from Youngsik’s grip, a hand coming out to strike the vampire only to be caught mid-motion. Grip tightening on Jongdae’s wrist, Youngsik’s free hand reaches to harshly tug Jongdae’s chin to the side, giving him more access to the human’s neck. Slyly, he licks a stripe of exposed skin on Jongdae’s neck, eyeing Joonmyun directly as he continues,

“Now that you’re here, I think it calls for a change of plans. Why not kill you? I’ll tell the regency that I saved this poor, weak, human from the big bad vampire and I had _no choice_ but to kill you. Given your background, I imagine it won’t be hard for them to believe it.”

Youngsik _bites_ and rage blisters in Joonmyun, spilling out and covering him until there’s nothing in his vision but that blood red _need_ calling for violence. All-consuming anger takes him and his eyes begin to flicker, hints of colour emerging as he narrows his eyes. The two guards approach, sensing the change in Joonmyun’s demeanour and preparing themselves to fight.

Like a waltz, Joonmyun takes measured steps towards his first opponent, a lazy smile creeping up the expanse of his lips.

_Insolence._

Light on his feet, the vampire doesn’t process Joonmyun’s movement until he’s standing behind her, eyes flashing dangerous blues and reds. Another movement processed and she’s fallen flat on the floor, back pressed against the cold tile, Joonmyun towering over her. The colours in his eyes intensify until they’re overlapping purples and Joonmyun’s shoe is pressing down against the woman’s neck until her trachea collapses and his foot hits bone. Stale blood from the body’s last feed seeps onto soles of his shoes and Joonmyun tsks.

_Jongdae was his._

The next victim doesn’t wait for Joonmyun to approach and runs at him in attempt to catch him off guard. A sickening crack reverberates in the room followed by the _thud_ of a body hitting the tiles. With a nonchalant ease Joonmyun wipes his dirtied shoes against the male’s waistcoat, his bloodied hands releasing the lower half of the vampire’s jaw onto the floor.

 _How_ dare _they touch what is his._

He takes care of Youngsik next. It barely takes any time before Joonmyun has a grasp on Youngsik, hand gripped around the vampire’s neck as he lets out a snarl, lips curling back. Tightening his grip, Joonmyun’s nails dig into blood-warmed skin until his fingers are slowly sinking in. Carnal urge overtaking him, Joonmyun’s eyes are a frighteningly beautiful shade of electric purple as they watch Youngsik struggle to free himself, hands scrambling uselessly at Joonmyun’s own. Joonmyun’s other hand free, it drifts up to cover Youngsik’s eyes, fingers beginning to apply a slow and soft pressure at the base of Youngsik’s eyes.

“ _Joonmyun_.”

Jongdae’s voice is sharp and it cuts through the blood thirsty haze pounding against his head.

“Release him.”

His soul mate’s voice is hard, but when Jongdae starts to stand, his legs buckle and he falls back into the chair. In an instant, Joonmyun’s kneeling in front of Jongdae. Youngsik’s body forgotten on the floor.

Calm and comfort washes over him as Jongdae’s hand meets his cheek, and he’s instinctually nuzzling into his soul mate’s touch; familiar as it casts a wave of warmth that courses throughout Joonmyun’s body, his thoughts beginning to centre and focus on the man before him. The words _Jongdae_ and _mine_ meld in his thoughts, pulling him away from blind rage. In an act of calmed submission, he simply turns his head to kiss the hand against his cheek, peering up to the other out of the corner of his eyes, murmuring against the skin under his lips, “I’ve missed you.”

In return, Jongdae’s voice is just as quiet as his own, the strength from earlier already faded, “Missed you too. Let’s go home, I’m tired.”

-

Two months later

-

Joonmyun feels unsurprisingly free for once; a freedom he hasn’t felt since he was human, and knew nothing of the world beyond what he could see and feel. It’s a freedom that can really only come when your soul mate is there and suddenly Joonmyun feels like he’s in a fairy tale. For once, taking the role of the protagonist and finally, getting his happy ending.

Joonmyun bites the supple skin again, hard enough to leave a mark, but not enough to pierce; licking the spot with soft slips of his tongue pressing against the sweaty neck, continuing to murmur against the skin, “You’re beautiful.”

 Pulling away from Jongdae’s neck, Joonmyun cups his cheeks, getting a good view of his soul mate and the face that had been painfully absent from his life for so long. Admiringly, Joonmyun takes in the features for a few long seconds, eyes meeting Jongdae’s before he leans in for a hard kiss, letting it morph into something slow and gentle. “I love you.” Another kiss, and the three words are spilling out of his mouth following each exchange afterwards, something inside of him unable to grasp the reality of the situation; elation rising in him each time.

“I’m still selfish enough to say this: even if I did take away your chance to be happier than this, I don’t regret it.” Teeth graze against the skin under his mouth and Joonmyun licks back the light traces of red, eyes flicking up possessively, “ _Mine_.”

-

 

**Author's Note:**

> thank you to hay. and han. for helping me through this process, both of you are lovely (●´ω｀●)
> 
> this was my third attempt posting to ao3 if this doesnt work im gonna give up istg


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